Shakespeare

Shakespeare were from the bullshit town of Eskilstuna Sweden known mostly for stainless steel and handball. You know the drill, these Svenne youth release one fucking amazing single, fail to rocket to superstardom, and go back to working at the Volvo factory. Meanwhile an incredible record drifts further and further away into legend.

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Pray For Metal

Never mind the crazy cover art depicting a topless barbarian princess holding a weird axe in one hand, and precariously balancing a skull in the other while she dances seductively in front of a giant Menorah. There is so much more to this album than all that, well maybe not. You do, however, get four pretty rocking Heavy Metal anthems delivered somewhat sloppily by some spirited lads from Linkoping, a bullshit town known for volleyball and making Saabs.

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Torsten

Fuck yeah Torsten. By now you should know the deal. Torsten, a hopeful young Swedish Heavy Metal band from the bullshit town of Loddekopinge, releases one great single, and then fades into obscurity. The singer sounds kind of punk as he sings about how he is "the best" on the a side "King of the Nest." The b side, "Are You Ready" is a balls-out rocking call to arms. The two tunes here are excellent, spirited, and just plain cool rocking Heavy Metal numbers. Like most of these one-off FWOSHM singles, this is more fun than you should probably be allowed.

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Gypsy

I imagine there were abut a million bands calling themselves Gypsy in the '80s but this post is about a young band of Swedish hopefuls who managed just one single in their time, but what a record it is. "Explosive Hangover" starts with a mournful acoustic guitar intro but soon jumps up to a mid-tempo rocker about waking up after a particularly drunken night. Our protagonist wakes to find a strange girl in his bed but not much else happens other than a clumsy guitar solo. "World War III" has a more 70s hard rock vibe, and fairly typical lyrics about the anxiety young people faced in the '80s around nuclear arms proliferation, a much more serious concern than waking up with some tramp you don't remember. So, Gypsy weren't all that good, but this record is a charmer, and at seven minutes, doesn't wear out it's welcome.

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Onyx

Here's a little scorcher of a Heavy Metal record from Sweden and a band called Onyx. These youngsters hailed from the blustery streets of Stockholm. They managed to crank out a demo and this brilliant EP before deciding that playing catchy melodic Heavy Metal was not where it's at. Onyx had chops and hooks for days and a couple of gems in guitarists Bjorn and Chris, but alas, this was not enough to rocket Onyx to any kind of real renown.

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Stormbringer

First off, this extremely rare demo has no cover so I arbitrarily chose a picture of Michael Moorcock's dour albino and the sword that ruled him, Stormbringer. Stormbringer, the band, hailed from the bullshit town of Karlshamn, a town best known for, well, nothing really. The band only released three demos in their short run, this one being the last. The material is doom influenced Swedish Heavy Metal but the ringer here is singer guy, Christian Nelson, who sounds like he has polished off a bit of Explorer in the studio. After the demise of Stormbringer the more tenacious members launched a new band called Faith, who were featured on this blog before. If you've come to love these Svenne Henne's teeth jewels of bygone Scandi-metal then I suggest you snatch this one up .

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Empire Saint

Get a load of the foppish popinjays of Empire Saint, a long gone Heavy Metal act hailing from the bullshit town of Boras (like Hearse alum Lonely Hearts), a town known for mailorder businesses, sheep, and as one reader pointed out, hot Italian and Greek immigrant ladies. So I guess when these Svenne coxcombs weren't wooing flickas outside the textile mill, they set about to some premium panty-droppin' rockin'. The a side of Empire Saint's debut single is a pretty hokey monster ballad called "Broken Dreams," which I am sure secured these Scandi-dandies a boatload of top shelf tonfisk, but it runs a bit Cinderella for me. The b side, "Shout Out" is a pretty vanilla but enjoyable hard pop anthem that might enhance a montage of you taking the city the by storm with your own crew of overdressed peacock men. Empire Saint obviously had their eye on the prize, but sadly were eclipsed by a billion other bands with flashy striped pants and mediocre songs. Oh well.

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Achilleus

Achilleus were another obscure bunch of Swedish kids playing the ol' hard rock/heavy metal in the '80s. They hailed from the bullshit town of Jönköping, a town best known for matchsticks and Agnetha Fältskog, the blonde one from ABBA. The a-side, "Allt Vi Begar" is a bouncy synth-enhanced rocker that is more of an AOR type number that dabbles in some metalisms. The b-side "Obergs Praster" is a bit wimpier with a kind of dancey back beat and glassy eighties guitars. Clearly Achilleus wanted to rock their way out Jönköping with this bit of commercially viable, and somewhat tame single. Well, that didn't happen, obviously, but this cool little record was left behind in the attempt and that is not a bad thing at all.

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Birth & Death

Hels were another lost Swedish Heavy Metal act that released one fantastic 7" and then disappeared in to faint memory shortly afterin 1985. Hels hailed from the bullshit town of Oxelösund, a town best known for iron works and trains. The A-side, "Life," is a pretty standard fist banging Metal anthem, but the B-side, "Death," exhibits some classic doom tendencies. I can't get enough of these Swedish bands from the '80s.

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Lonely Hearts

Another stunning rare FWOSHM single from 1984. Lonely Hearts hailed from the bullshit town of Boras, a town known for sheep and mail order businesses. Unfortunately the band only managed to eke out this record before singer/bassist Christer Eriksson died at a rather young age. The a-side is a steely scorcher called simply "Lonely Heart," and while the b-side is a decidedly less rocking AOR number called "One More Night" it is still an enjoyable enough song. These kids had chops and pep, sad they never did more.

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INSANE!!!

You all seem to respond to the posts about these early FWOSHM (first wave of Swedish Heavy Metal) bands, so I am excited to share with you all one of my favorite of these obscure recordings, Insane's Games of the World demo from 1983. Insane hailed from the bullshit town of Oskarshamn, a town known for it's nuclear power plant. We have well established that these young Swedish metal bands all seem to share a natural, naive charm and a seemingly endless joy in playing no-frills Heavy Metal, Insane is no different really. Insane's songwriting craft was a step above the milieu, these songs will stick like peanut butter in your pubes (don't ask how it got there.) Lyrically they deal in the usual metal topics: evil, knights, swords...but then there is the track "Living and Loving (and Dying For You)" in which front dude, Freddy Kuk, woefully croons about finding out that his favorite flicka is, in fact, a lesbian. Tough break, Kuk. Games of The World is so insanely great that is should be filed under "if you don't love this you are a dick."

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Bootleg

Here's another henstooth of proto-FWOSHM goodness from Bootleg, a peppy pack of Svennes from some bullshit town I am sure. Why the band chose to use their yearbook pictures on this, their one and only release, is beyond me, but that is hardly the most problematic design element on the record's cover. Let's talk about the two songs contained in this enticing package, shall we? Side one contains the brilliant "Dagdrommar," which I assume means "Daydreamer." The song is an infectious hard rocker sung in the native tongue, and more than makes up for the lackluster live recording on side two, "Tankar Om Dej." This record isn't as metallic as that Stitch EP that made our Swedish meatballs tingle last week, but still plenty tasty.

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Stitch

Another one of my favorite relics of Swedish steel, and this one is absolutely mandatory. Stitch were a young ambitious bunch of bangers from the bullshit town of Södertälje, a town best known for its famous tennis robot, the Bjorn Borg. This single contains (sadly) only two songs, but they drip with a peppy exuberance and a sheer joy of just being young, Scandinavian, and most importantly...METAL!!! This falls into that "If you don't love this something is really wrong with you" category. So good, and maybe exactly what the doctor ordered after posts about people we like leaving the earth.

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Arrowz

Holy fuck!!! This has to be one of the greatest obscure bits of early Swedish metal of all time, Arrowz (not to be confused with the other great Swedish metal act Arrows) and their decidedly fucked up Birds of Steel/Help Me single. I mean, fuck, check out the drummer, he looks like a math teacher. So can the music contained within meet the grand promise of their logo and their look? Well, shit howdy, it far surpasses any expectation with it's drunken lo-fi grit, ham-fisted amateurish playing, and desperate vocals belting out ESL lyrics about detrimental partying and metallic birds. The only downside to this record is that it is a scant eight minutes. Arrowz did follow up with a demo that I would gladly fork over my left nut for, even just a batch of shitty sounding mp3s. If you don't absolutely love this record you are probably some kind of nazi baby raper. Just sayin'.

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Proud

Proud were yet another sadly overlooked FWOSHM (First Wave of Swedish Heavy Metal) band that could hold their own against some Hearse faves like Torch, Gotham City, and Glory Bells (well maybe not Glory Bells, they were ridiculously awesome.) So you know the drill: great hooks and leads, influences taken from the greats of NWOBHM but executed with a bit more skill and class, that is how most of these Swedish bands operated and Proud were really no different, with the exception that there was something distinctly maudlin in their sound. Fire Breaks The Dawn, the band's only release, came out in 1984. It was released by EMI, leading me to believe that someone had high hopes for these lads, but alas this great album was forever relegated to the cut-out bins of history.

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220 Volt

220 Volt were a young Heavy Metal band from Ostersund Sweden. The Prisoner of War ep was the first release and was recorded in 1983, while most of the dudes were still in high school. According to Metal Archive's page on 220 Volt, the group started as the result of a goony golf mishap (check it!) The band would eventually switch to a more commercial hard rock style a few years later which brought them some success in Sweden but failed to make them a household name outside the region. This little EP is a rocking hen's tooth of Scandi-youthfulness and vigor. If you can't find anything to like in it then you are probably dead.

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Ambush

Here's a fantastic little record from another unknown early Swedish metal band called Ambush. Some very gracious reader helped me cross this off my wishlist, but because I am an ungrateful asswad I forgot who that was.

Tack Själv

Torch

Another overlooked classic of Swedish steel here. Torch's first full length (they released an EP prior to this) is off the fucking hook NWOBHM-inspired goodness. Why there were so many great Heavy Metal bands coming out of Sweden between '82 and '85 is a mystery, but if you've been following the Hearse and got all fucking vimmelkantig over The Glory Bells, Faith, Gotham City, and Overdrive, then definitely check out Torch.

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Glory

The Glory Bell's Band (later called simply Glory Bells) were another outrageously gifted Swedish Heavy Metal band you probably haven't heard of. Their debut album from 1985, Dressed In Black has had me in its power for the last few weeks. Imagine Sad Wings of Destiny-era Judas Priest meets Taken By Force-era Scorps with one of the most hyperactive falsetto voices, and you might begin to get an idea of what The Glory Bells are about. That nutter vocalist was none other than the enigmatic Glory North, who sadly passed away earlier this year. Glory was a vocal chameleon sometimes sounding a bit like Udo, sometimes Klaus Meine, but always sounding like himself, if that makes sense. Also check out the chops of drummer, Peter Udd, the guy was clearly raised on a steady diet of Mick Tucker. His skills behind the kit later landed him the gig as the first drummer of Yngwie's Rising Force. If you got a diamond cutting hard-on over the posts about Witch Cross, Gotham City, Faith, and Wizz, add Glory Bells to the list of top notch Scandi-Metal to make your bag tingle.

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Wizz

Here we have Wizz, a lost Swedish band named after pee, and their one and only album, Crazy Games. Outside of the ever-present Jon Lordian keys that coat Wizz's sound in a cool retro veneer, it's a fairly average record. However these are some fun songs, and you get a few peak moments from singer, George King (not to be confused with King George who was King of Great Britain and King of Ireland from October 1760 until January 1801.) Of course it bears a degree of class and refinement that seemed to be present in many of these early Swedish Metal bands, and lacking in American and British bands from the same period. Kind of reminds me a bit of Rainbow (the band, not the meteorological phenomenon that causes a spectrum of light to appear in the sky when the Sun shines onto droplets of moisture in the Earth's atmosphere). Come on, take a Wizz.

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